Married, but looking...

My son talks to his friends via instant-messenger service on the internet. Everyone using it chooses an alias, or screen name. They also attach photos of themselves and complete a profile. One of the questions on the profile asks for marital status.

A drop down menu offers the following choices: single, married, long-term relationship, single, but not looking, single and looking, separated, divorced, widow/widower, and yes – married, but looking. I suppose such is par for the course in the “Sex and the City” society in which we live.

We face many problems in America today, but none has more potential for long-term destruction than the libertine sexual mores that are shoved down children’s throats every minute of every day. While disappointed, I’m not surprised. Today’s parents, as well as many other traditional authority figures, are true children of the ‘60’s. They believed the sex-without-consequences lifestyle was the path to emotional freedom.

But the consequences were there all the same. Teen pregnancy, abortions, cases of sexually transmitted disease, depression and suicide have risen steadily and only recently show signs of decline. One must always be careful not to see cause behind every effect, but it does seem interesting that teen sexual activity increased sharply after both Roe vs. Wade and the introduction of sex education in public schools.

According to a recent article in Reader’s Digest, a new game is for teen girls to wear different colored bracelets. If a boy can snatch a bracelet off the girl’s wrist, the color of the band determines what sexual act the girl will perform – from a simple kiss to oral sex or intercourse. In spite of the safe-sex instruction and availability of birth control devices, 25 percent of all new STD cases are amongst teens.

The town of LaGrange, GA was shocked recently by the case of a seven year-old girl forced into the bushes and sexually assaulted. As heartbreaking and disgusting as the story is, we know that pedophiles abuse seven-year old girls. What makes this story different is that the assailants weren’t pedophiles. They were both 10-year-old boys.

According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Juvenile Court Judge Michael Key stated, "the public needs to be aware our children are committing more and more serious crimes at younger and younger ages." Another judge, Peggy Walker, agreed with Judge Key. "I see younger and younger children doing more serious crimes. And it's not just sex crimes. There is a great deal more violence." Judge Walker blames a lack of parental supervision, as well as a declining cultural standard. "A lot of it,” said Judge Walker, “is…a culture with a great deal of violence and sex. It gives children a sense that this is a lifestyle, and it is an acceptable lifestyle, and that there are not consequences.”

It’s not just young children falling prey to the false promises of sexual ecstasy. College-bound children are leaving home for educational opportunities that will afford them a bright future. Many of these children leave home having been taught proper sexual values, but are affected by what they see once in school.

Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse, author of “101 Tips for a Happier Marriage,” writes in a recent column, “Yes, the sexual revolution happened 30 years ago. Yes, middle-aged people get exhausted by it, and look around for something more stable. But new recruits are being enlisted every year. In fact, we could say that the college freshmen are conscripts in the sexual revolution, as they are quartered in their co-ed dorms, a situation that is almost sure to make them sexually active. I don't think it is an accident that young people enter college pro-life, and leave college pro-choice. It is not just the content of the propogandistic curriculum they hear in class. It is also the compromised situation in which they are forced to live.”

Part of the problem, as I see it, is that we have once again attempted to deny nature. Men are men, and if unrestrained by strong moral convictions will look for easy sex. In past generations, society could count on the virtue of women to restrain the sexual aggression of men, and as a result repress much of the social dysfunction that comes with rampant promiscuity. But today’s girls are becoming the sexual aggressors. And they are paying the price both physically and emotionally.

Fathers, teach your boys sexual restraint – not “sexual responsibility.” And mothers, know this: as go women, so goes society. The success of 2000 years of Western Culture is due primarily to the strength and decency of its women.

Teach your daughters to respect their bodies and their emotions. Teach them virtue. Teach them that real men will love and respect them for their chastity and decency.

Otherwise, they or their husbands may be signing on to Instant Messenger with “Married, but looking” in their profile.